Trip to the toilet

After the highs of last week’s post, we’re crashing back down to reality with a rant.
And possibly not the direction you’ll expect it to go in.
On Saturday, I had to use a public loo, not the only time in my life I’ve done this, but on this occasion, it was a portaloo. However, I’m not talking about portaloos for today’s post, just thought you’d like to know.
But no, today’s post is about the sounds of public loos. I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned, but I’ve not got an office job where I go in every day. This means using the office toilets.
They are silent. This is usually fine but sometimes there is someone else in the toilet – I should point out this doesn’t just apply to the office toilets – but I’d prefer a bathroom that utilised some sound.
Bluntly, I don’t want to hear what is going on in the cubicle next door.
Sometimes it is clear you’re next to someone who pisses as powerfully as a horse, other times they’re taking a dump on the work clock. Whatever they are doing, I’d rather not be able to work it out from the sound coming to me.
As problems go, this is quite an easy fix. Put some music on. Or failing that, teach me Italian. For all the kids that grew up with a trip to Frankie and Benny’s, you’ll get that reference. I don’t understand why people think the activity that takes place in the toilet needs to be heard by others.
It’s not just the standard toilet activity that happens in the toilet. The other day a colleague retreated to the safety of the toilet to have a powerful nose blow – something she felt wasn’t graceful enough to do in the open plan office. If she didn’t want others to hear, she probably would also like to not be heard in the toilet too.
Ask most girls on a night out where they make friends and they’ll tell you its the toilet. Ask them, if during the day they make any toilet friends and they’ll probably say no. I’m not saying having music playing so you can’t hear your neighbour is the only difference, but it is worth thinking about.

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